Photo by Lisett Kruusimae on Pexels. I love it as it adds some levity to this pretty spooky and serious topic!
Welcome to my October Spooky Series! I hope you find this entertaining, interesting and, ultimately, that it helps keep you safe. xo
Hello my dear friends!
I hope that you’re enjoying the crisp air, the shift into winter. As I write this tiny love letter, I’m at my new favorite coffee shop.
For this Spooky Love Letter, I want to share with you the importance of maintaining your power in the face of spiritual “leaders,” and even regular old psychics. As you navigate and chart the course of your destiny, you’ll come across people who claim to know what’s best for you spiritually, and some of these people, though they seem well meaning, could be dangerous rocks on your journey. They can be hard to recognize but here are some of the (sometimes subtle) signs:
They will try to Isolate You
They will feed off of your pain
They will say they have a direct line to the divine that, funny, you don’t seem to have
They will connect with other, cult-like material
They will say they're speaking for God. Now, many priests and religious people do this, too, so just use your discernment here.
If you come into a session with me, you might come up against a wall if you ask me to tell you what to do.
Which job to take?
Which place to move to?
What to do with this relationship?
And, unless there is obvious fear for safety, I often don't give a clear answer, and there's a reason. I can tell you what the energy of different options looks like, we can even look at it together and see what your intuitive senses say, but, ultimately, every decision about your own life is yours to make. It is your life, your destiny, your karma. An ethical psychic respects the boundaries between you, says what she sees, and steps back so that you can make the decisions.
Even with a recent client, who I discovered watches scary movies, I was like, “It would be good for you if you decided to watch less of these, but you do what feels right to you."
That’s the closest I got to trying to persuade. It is her life and her decision.
I was trained about the importance of maintaining client authority and autonomy. What that means is that you are the keeper of your own destiny. It would be so wrong of me, or anyone, to make decisions for you, and it would take away your power.
I also am not one of those psychics who can feel things intensely and say, with authority, “the winds of destiny say you should move to Phoenix.”
(Some people ARE that psychic, and I would love to feel what that's like sometime. But that's not my usual experience of life, sadly!)
Instead, with me, you’ll hear “I don’t know why, but there is strong horse energy in your space, and I see a horse and tickets to something? Does that resonate?” and you might say, “I’ve been dreaming of going to a dude ranch in Montana.” And I would say, “Well, that’s really strong in your space, so I would think about it if I were you.”
(Yes, a conversation like this really did happen.)
People often want to give their power over to someone else, especially someone who claims to have a spiritual connection to the divine, but it’s important to keep and maintain your own authority over the decisions you make in your life, and not to let others decide for you.
Falling for unethical psychics, writers, or spiritual leaders can happen to anyone, including me, which is what gave me the idea to write this article to you.
Let me give you a personal example:
There’s a spiritual leader who I’ve been studying for a few months now, and whose books I’ve had for years. She says good stuff, she’s incredibly well educated, and she’s much smarter than I am. I was like, “I’ve found my next teacher.” But then I did a deep dive into her lectures and uncovered some subtly scary things–the same Red Flags that you always need to keep an eye out for.
1 - She says that she is the only way.
She says not to trust other psychics, saying that the biggest criminals in the world are psychics. Well, wow. What does that say about Laura Lynn Jackson who dedicates her life to helping grieving parents? What does that say about my mentor whose mission in life is heal people and the planet and is one of the nicest, kindest, funniest people I’ve ever met? About healers around the world who dedicate their lives to helping others? And what does that say about my many clients, most of whom are psychic themselves? What does that say about you and your intuition?
If someone says not to trust anyone but themselves, they're using a tact of alienation and saying, clearly, that they are the only way and the only one you should trust, removing your intuition and sense of discernment. They will decide for you who you should trust (and, by the way, it’s them). Be Wary. You should ALWAYS be able to use your own instincts and intuition to discern who to trust in life.
2 - She says that your pain has a malignant effect on others.
This is isolating. Incredibly isolating. As I went through a very difficult period recently and listened to this, it was so unhelpful and the opposite of what others told me, which is that pain is an opportunity to let others care which, in itself, is a gift.
This is another tactic in isolation. Part of the human condition is living through pain and difficult times, and those who don’t have your best interests at heart may try to reach you while you’re down and, instead of help you, harm you further. (By the way, if you would like to read a beautiful book about life and pain, I highly recommend Elaine Pagel's book Why Religion? A Personal Story. That book is so moving and... sigh. Deeply meaningful.)
3 - She pretends to be angels and to speaks from Heaven.
Yes, this is something that she does. She wants others to understand the voice of Heaven or the Angels so she will role play. Of course, she is the angel delivering the teaching. It makes me feel uncomfortable in a strange way. Like, I like what she says but it still feels wrong in some way.
4 - She uses fear to control.
I do like that she tells people to be prepared, both emotionally and mentally, for terrible things, but she is constantly saying that people can get cancer, lose their jobs, have environmental issues, etc. She is right; she’s right. But it’s also a method of control.
Having issues in life is, again, part of life. We all go through the shadows of the valley of death, as it were. But a huge amount of our lives is OK, and it’s important to know that. If someone is hawking fear constantly, then perhaps they are to be heeded yet not trusted.
5 - She says that other, cult-like material, is beautiful.
That was shocking. If you want to know what it was, email me. I’ll not mention it here because I do not want followers of that material to contact me.
And here’s the thing: this woman is powerful. She’s smarter than I am, she's very persuasive, bossy, and energetic. She can tell you what to do with a voice of authority.
She claims to be very, very spiritual, and she probably is.
Does she know that she’s also tracing these cult-like lines? I don’t know but I do know that, for me, I will enjoy and learn from her work but also with the eye of a skeptic, as these flags are waving. Wildly.
Cults are easy to fall into, and some spiritual "teachers" aren't as safe as they say they are--so use caution! They pray on our emotions, they tell us what to do and how to be alright, they say they’re the direct line to the divine, they alienate us, and they offer us help out of our pain.
But ultimately, when it comes down to you and your life, you are the person making the decisions.
When I was a nurse, one of the biggest tenants we had to learn was that anything that we do to a patient is our responsibility. Yes, a doctor might tell you to do something but YOU are the one who then decides whether or not your hands will actually do it. Why is it important to know this? Because you are responsible.
It's the same with your wild and beautiful life.
In your own heart and the quietude of your mind, there’s just you. And you need to do your own thinking and decision making, because only you are living this magnificent life of yours.
So be wary of others who try to decide for you. Maintain your gut intuition. And remember that
YOU are the captain of your ship. Not the spiritual leader who tells you what to say, think, or do.
Big hugs from you, and thanks for letting me write you a Spooky Letter!
Paige
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